- Get Involved
In these lines I want to leave a testimony of the days I spent at the Awakened Life Project, all that i lived there and the impact that the 10 Day Evolutionary Awakening Retreat had on me, although there is no way to describe how fully we were warmly welcomed and transported into new realms during these days! I felt like I was being trained in a subject that society does not study and does not teach, the Art of Life!
If I remember correctly, at the beginning, everything was still very busy inside! We were to spend 5 days in silent meditation. Just "BE" seemed something very difficult, my head said it would be unreachable (what a duality!) And then, I trusted and made the noble effort of not to give in to my mind and to its madness.
For days the voices in my head continued to corrupt the silence, as if those voices wanted to keep me inside a bubble lined with fears. For some time I had the image of sitting in a roller coaster, which caused me spasms right in the center of my belly, as if someone were turning my stomach upside down!
It was when, for fractions of a second at first, that I began to experience a sense of presence and peace that was still very foreign to me.
Then from spending 5 days Being in silent meditation we transitioned into the Becoming half of the retreat. Peter took us on a journey from vast nothingness into appearance of form and creation. I felt my identity with the entire cosmos and this shifted my center of gravity! These teachings showed me that I have value, All, Everything, has value, that Being One is immense and there is no way to be different. I felt again and again that That One is Love - what else could it be!?
Then Peter & Cynthia gave names to the schizophrenic voices in my head - EGO! They helped me to recognize it, to distance myself from it, to realize that I'm not that and, in that discovery, I found compassion.
Then the ego reacted with some force to what I was realizing. I battled with myself, I refused and tried to make everything I heard trite, as indeed, all these forces usually do!
But then, they taught us about Intention. I was told that I can choose to be Free, and that in the deepest place I AM Free! That I have all the power I need to choose, indeed I am the Universe!! Discovering this huge intention helped me to literally feel the universe to evolving through "me" and I was part of it, so I know it's big, it cannot be otherwise! This tremendous evolutionary force awoke me and loved me with all the compassion you can imagine!
At this point I knelt before Life and I made the most beautiful and heartfelt promise to commit myself!
I never want to forget this promise!
Clarity of Intention, as we discussed, activates the Light. And when fear and doubt come I want to remember that I am not that. "There's plenty of room for fear, in spiritual life, but no room for hesitation!", I remember well this quote from Andrew Cohen that Pete shared with us ;)
When fear and doubt arise, I'll remember to give space to myself. Sit still, relax and be alert! Having infinite compassion for myself and just be. It seems so simple and yet, the more I think about it and sit to meditate, the more huge it is!!
(I am sitting here above)
During these 10 days a strong conviction that I carried with me for a long time, the conviction that everything in this world is very wrong, fell to the ground! How could the universe have come this far if it was fundamentally a mistake!? I am so grateful for realizing that in the deepest essence nothing is really wrong!
Finally, as Pete asked, how far does our sense of responsibility and purpose go!? In the last 2 days Pete and Cynthia, in different ways, made it very clear that there is a purpose to being here - to evolve, which means to bring the miraculous truth of oneness into manfestation in and through our human being.
I want to be able to trust this mystery again and again, to honor the biggest truth that I have already experienced so that I will not fall back to sleep!
It is amazing that you exist, beautiful Awakened Life Family
An eternal and sincere thank you,
Angela Rodrigues, Lisboa